Well, hello young wanderer. Let me tell you a story. A legend, if you will, of a great warrior who engaged in an epic battle. The war, and the prize at hand? The best diaper pail to contain smell.
How we Found it: The VERY Best Diaper Pail
There comes a time in every person's life when they are faced with an obstacle so large, so vast and so advanced they have to look deep, deep down inside themselves and find the strength they were destined to wield so that they might overcome the one foe that could destroy them. The one foe they may have thought they could avoid and dance around. The one insidious enemy that shakes people to the core and always creeps up on them. No shield is strong enough to stop it and no wall can hold it back. It rises like a tide. It strikes like a swarm of locusts.
Then came the hero. The one to save us all. The slayer of poopy diapers. The best diaper pail to contain smell.
It's a normal old Simple Human pail. There it is: the secret. It uses regular kitchen trash bags, it opens up with a quick step on a lever, and I don't have to fuss with any spinny contraptions or weird closure nonsense. Best of all, it encloses the smell completely…while it's closed. We'll get to that in a sec.
After kid number two or three came along, Chelsea started handing me over to them all too eagerly. When the time came, I didn't hold back. No! I stepped up like a man (with no way out) and hit it head on.
“So? It's cute little bits of baby poo. Just like bunnies, right? I can do this. I'll just get right in there and…OH MY GOD!!! Chelsea, what has he been eating?”
What I didn't expect was the effect of the aftermath. Once I had slain what seemed to be like a hundred diapers or so, I stacked all their corpses like a mountain. A warning to any dirty diaper who dare think about entering our home. And then…
“OH MY GOD!!! I just changed you.” I added yet another to my mountain.
Then it hit me. Almost like the plague.
The mass grave I had set next to my changing table to collect the dirty diaper leagues' bodies was now going to be my undoing. The stench when the lid was closed was kept at bay entirely. But when I opened it, it was…noxious. Putrid. Overwhelming. This was the dirty diaper's evil spirit come back to haunt these lands. I was a mere mortal. How could I fight that which I could not see? I removed the diapers, but their memory still remained. Even though we had the best diaper pail to contain smell, I needed to do something to freshen it from within.
That's why I'm lucky I have Chelsea. Apparently, she's a spirit warrior. Able to conjure power from another realm to fight the evil living on the ‘other plane.'
This Extra Secret Snatches Stench
Chelsea had acquired a bottle of Zep Garbage Odor Eliminator, apparently some type of magical potion used to ward off these evil spirits.
I put some directly into the best diaper pail to contain smell. After a few seconds they were gone. Well, the smell was anyway. Replaced by the scent of cherry. And citronella…I don't actually know what that smells like but I could definitely smell cherry. Like a Shirley Temple. Mmmmm.
So, young wanderer. If you too are about to venture into the valley of the Poopy Diaper League, heed my words. Buy the best diaper pail to contain smell. Then, find a spirit warrior with the magical Zep potion or get some yourself at Home Depot for $4.97. You can slay as many diapers as you want, but it's their spirit that will get you. Unless you have Zep.